Picking the Part of Your Life

* I pulled this one out of the archives, but it still rings true. Publishing it for myself, and for all the mommies of little ones once again. Enjoy!*

Sometimes as a mom to multiple littles under five, life can move so fast and the list of to-do's gets so long, that inevitably I forget something. I'm ashamed to admit I've forgetten lunches, I've forgetten to send the kids to school with a raincoat on the rainiest day of the year, I've rushed them out the door so fast that I've forgetten to check if they brushed their teeth. The list goes on! Sometimes the list of expectations get so high that I forget to be... human. I pick myself apart until there's nothing left.

When the chaos of life seems to spin and I find myself simply trying to survive, it's so easy to forget the things that actually matter the most. It may FEEL like raising these kids is my greatest challenge, but the truth is that they are actually my greatest purpose. Isn't life funny like that?

It's so easy to buzz through our day to day life, so distracted by our to-do lists that we completely miss out on the purpose and joy already around us.

It's easy to get carried away searching for something profound, or some big task to make our lives significant and purposeful. Meanwhile, the very people in our lives, who I would argue play the greatest role in your purpose, are skimmed over or given the title of "frustration." What if... WHAT IF... the very people and situations right in front of you were put there to grow you, shape, you and to be your greatest contribution of your life?

For me, there are moments that I find myself hyper focusing on what my kids (and everyone else) are doing wrong. I can drill in to that trying to correct every little thing. But recently God has been encouraging me to notice instead what’s RIGHT, unique and irreplaceable about them. Look, I'm not saying that we shouldn't correct our kids, they of course need guidance. But it's easy to get focused on what's going wrong, and in doing so miss the beauty of what they are becoming.

I'm guilty of forgetting what I was like growing up as a kid... how quickly I forget that I, too, was imperfect! I was incredibly strong willed, feisty, stubborn, and mouthy ... but despite all of that, my parents were the absolute best at seeing past my imperfections and seeing what was forming in me. I was so lucky to have parents who chose to consistently affirm me. As I look back, I think they might have saved my life. They gave me the safety to grow up and become whatever God was making me into, in spite of some immense challenges to come. I don't know what my kids will face one day. But, I pray that I've given them everything they need to persevere through whatever comes their way.

The thing I'm most grateful for my in parents was that they consistently told me that someday I’d make a difference in our world. They had no evidence of that. By all measures, there were years I even wondered if I was smart enough to make it through school. I was never the A+ student- I struggled, and you guessed it... had a terrible memory... But you know what? Little by little, when someone tells you something enough, you begin to believe them. I believed my parents. I made it through. And despite my struggles, I'm not homeless, praise God!

That's not to say that I didn't experience a lot of hurdles, difficulties, criticism and judgment down the road. Just like you, I've faced a mountains worth. Not everyone saw me the same way my parents did. Not everyone had the same grace or foresight to see what I could become. We’ve all experienced someone who’s an expert at finding our flaws (as if we need help!) They key anyone overcoming is having enough good deposited inside a person to overcome the negative they will eventually hear.

Through a series of events, and through my parents love, and now my kids as a reminder God has been gracious enough to show me that no matter my flaws, no matter other people's judgement... His grace is NEVER ending, and it's more than enough for me. That He made me enough to face my battles. That I AM cut out for this life.

Because I’m a recipient of His overwhelming grace, the least I can do is pay it forward. I may not have all the brains to share, but I can give grace to the people in my life. Day by day, God's reminding me through my kids that what’s wrong with people isn’t nearly as important as what’s RIGHT.

The potential inside of a person is more important than the mistakes they are making.

Who they are today is not nearly as important as who they are becoming, and I’m so honored that He’s allowed me to be a part of shaping that in my precious kids.

Reflecting back, I've learned that you and I have the privilege to play the part of builder in others. When we see a flaw, we can choose not to speak that as an identity, but to see it as a building block toward learning. When we get the urge to criticize, we can build in confidence instead. We always have the choice to leave people better than we found them.

It doesn't just go for others... it goes for ourselves too. Now that I'm an adult, I have to encourage my-SELF! When I feel less than, I need to remind myself that with Christ, I am more than a conquerer (Roman 8:37). I am made in His image (Genesis 1:27). I can do all things through Him (Philippians 4:13). I'm called according to His purposes (Romans 8:28). And so are you!

The words we choose to speak over ourselves and others have the power to turn a life around, or set it on the wrong path.

James 3:2-4 gives us a great reminder of the power we hold:

“2...Indeed, we all make many mistakes. For if we could control our tongues, we would be perfect and could also control ourselves in every other way. 3We can make a large horse go wherever we want by means of a small bit in its mouth. 4And a small rudder makes a huge ship turn wherever the pilot chooses to go, even though the winds are strong. 5In the same way, the tongue is a small thing that makes grand speeches. But a tiny spark can set a great forest on fire.”

Wow. Those are powerful words. (no pun intended!) What if instead of being someone that picks apart or sets someone’s life on fire, we be people who pick the PART of building people up, and we play it well? What good might happen if we choose to pick the PART that God created us to play and live it with complete passion, hope and purpose? The truth is that perfection is a fallacy- and holding ourselves and others to a standard that high causes more fires than buildings.

What matters most, whether you are a parent or not, is that we leave people better than we found them, hopefully inspiring one another to play our parts. Because none of us is perfect, and none of us can do this alone. Let's all pick a part, not pick apart.

XO-Natalie